They say a picture speaks a thousand words. If this is true, then emoji means you could write a novel in no time at all. If you’ve not got a clue what emoji are, they’re a selection of tiny little cartoons used mostly on mobile phones in texts, which range from the normal (dog, cat, car, etc…) to the frankly ridiculous (man in a bathtub, an aubergine, dollar bill with wings, etc…). Just looking at the assortment of little emoji on my phone now, I see a best-selling novel starting to appear…
Santa and one of the Queen’s Guards found a turtle near a volcano. They were happy and drove a tractor to a castle where they saw the head of the Statue of Liberty and a ghost. To celebrate they rode a horse into the city to enjoy a… whisky? But, but, but, but… There’s no whisky emoji!
I knew I'd find a use for this Creative Writing degree at some point.
That’s right, there’s isn’t a whisky emoji at all. A travesty, I’m sure you’ll agree. As I said, there is an emoji for nearly everything, including drinks - if you’re going out for a beer or wine with friends, you’ve got some beer and wine emoji. Grabbing cocktails? You’re sorted with the cocktail emoji. Heck, the folks behind all of these emoji even got specific and made a martini emoji! And yet, whisky has been left out of the crew.
It totally was me.
With emoji originating in Japan in the late 1990s, and Japanese whisky being a pretty massive, delicious thing, you’d think that someone would have just thought to throw in a whisky emoji during all that time. Because really, do you actually need five different book emoji, nine cat face emoji and two different camel emoji, but no whisky emoji?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Laugh it up, jerks.
If you’re a bit peeved about this (there’s an emoji for the angry face you might be making), know that you are not alone, as the lovely chaps at Ballantine's have started bringing this to everyone’s attention in the hopes that it will make the whisky emoji happen! What’s more, they’ve gone and started up a #hashtag on twitter to help it along! If you want to show your support for quickly telling your friends about enjoying a whisky after work, join in and tweet #WhiskyEmoji and we can bring about the whisky emoji that has been missing from our texts for too long.
That said, two ice cubes? Looks like we might need more that one emoji. We'll obviously need one without ice cubes, maybe even one with a drop of water, definitely one in a proper tasting glass....